Ok this is serious - everyone drop everything, because it's 2:34am and I am having a minor crisis here. I couldn't sleep and given my new vocational freedom don't have a set schedule per se, so decided to come out to the living room and pass the time on the 'ol pasocon (you'd never guess that came from English, would you?). I go into the kitchen to pour myself another Captain 'n Coke (yarr!!), and what laid before me?
A COCKROACH. And I'm not talking any cockroach, I'm talking a COCKROACH THE FRICKING SIZE OF TEXAS. I'm not referring to Texas-sized cockroaches, because we all know they like everything huge down there, no I'm talking the state of Texas, as in this thing could take on Godzilla and probably win, if he were not in fact a mythical creature. Yes I know it's paradoxical considering the state of Texas is geographically bigger than Japan, but this thing is seriously grotesquely huge... disposal is going to be a delicate situation that is going to be handled totally hush-hush on the DL as not to disturb the already-scared-to-death-of-bugs girlfriend.
For those of you taking notes at home, this is a reason that rent is cheaper on the first floor of buildings (at least in Japan) - bugs. Japan does not mess around when it comes to bugs, oh no. They thrive in the moist and humid environs and that goes double for us first floorers. I was lucky enough to know enough Japanese to get around before I got here the first time for my 1-year study abroad all those years ago, but the first new word that I learned coming off the plane and settling into my new digs at the dorm was "gokiburi" (cockroach).
And of course it doesn't stop there - I scooped up a Mothra-sized moth to shoo out the window the other night, and I've even been assaulted by bugs in my pants. I was also chased down the hall once by the worst of all the bugs I know in Japan: mukade. Those things just freak me out.
Ok, well I'm going to sip my drink and then go curl up in a corner and cry myself to sleep now (I kid).
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