Back in the 'hama

Ok, I'll write a slightly more meaningful post later, but for now I'm just here to say happy frickin' New Year. I'm back in Japan, at least in body, although I still feel like I'm about to keel over from jetlag after the day's work.

Before I pass out, a random thought for you to ponder which, in lieu of some primo drugs possibly only severe sleep deprivation can provide: why are cows sacred in India? I mean, out of all the animals they have, why pick the bovine? If it were me, I'd go with either an elephant or a tiger.

Let's weigh the options here: first cows. Ok, so I think we all know that cows are big dumb animals that'll eat their own shit if you don't stop them, which is totally disgusting. They are also quite tasty in their own right and provide me milk, which when combined with Kahlua and vodka forms the Voltron of drinks, none other than the almighty White Russian (has anyone ever met a Black Russian btw? Just curious). So I say that's at least like 2 or 3 reasons against cows without me even really trying - I'm not revering something that dumb and tasty when I could be clubbing it over the head and eating it. How the hell can you worship something that sits in a field and eats grass all day??

Now the flip side of the coin - what about the options? Elephants are supposed to be pretty smart I think... or at least have a good memory. They can do tricks and join circuses, and the pink ones can fly. I've also seen them help people celebrate what looks to be the most awesomest New Year's celebration evar, Songkran! That's one of those things I want to witness before I die, so mental association with this is automatic cool points for the elephants and their Lord of the Rings counterparts the oliphant. In fact, the fact that they made an LoTR appearance is another point! I also recently heard from a friend that apparently you can find our long-nosed friends occasionally frolicking and cavorting about on the highways of New Delhi. Finally, I don't know if they're tasty or not, but I've never heard of people lining up to bite into an elephant steak so I'm gonna go with "not as good as cows."

And now tigers, which I believe to be the most regal of the bunch. Tigers are fearsome predators which any Indian jungle-goers would know need to be respected. They look damn cool and downright majestic... good enough to worship? Well, better than a cow. Tigers are more likely to eat stuff than be eaten since they graze on cows and elephants, not grass. Tigers are just frickin' cool - you know you wanted to check out the tigers when you visited the local zoo as a kid.

So there you have it - any idea why Indians worship cows and not tigers? Respect the almighty tigers and elephants!!!